Spring Training

One way to chose a project

I’ve been strength training.
Wut? Me? The yoga devotee? Why?
I was desperate that’s why.
We only change
Or at least mostly change
When the choice
Is between change or pain.

But I was persistently failing at finding the hours it would take
To get to fitness with an asana practice.
I’ve done it before.
When I had time.
So much more time.
(PS I saw that they found a time particle this week.
In a reel on Insta.
Now I can’t find it
Although it seems like it should def be a headline.
And I don’t have time
To find the time particle article!)

Anyway I’d joined a gym.
But the logistics and boringness
And lack of results ruled that out.
So I quit the gym.

And there’s a lot
That walking breaks can give you.
Fresh air.
Connection with the neighborhood.
Coffee from the best coffee place.
Tree love.
The book box.
Lymph health.
A nice check-in call.
And a writer’s walk
Where I describe what I’m seeing.
Like two identical flowers: twins etc.
It can shake loose my brain.
But none of that is rigorous physical fitness.
And my favorite jacket was getting tight.
Like I said.
Desperate.

And then
Maybe six months ago.
We found a flyer at our door.
I went to throw it away
Mitch said you should keep it
You might want it.
He tends to be a keeper.
I tend to be a tosser.
But he can be very intuitively brilliant.
So I did keep it.

And one day in a fit of December desperation - too much sitting!!!! -
I pulled out the flyer.
Workouts for busy people!
That’s me.
I called this guy.
He was super soft sell
In that way that people who know they have the goods can be.
I could try one workout and see.
Sure.
Like my discovery calls.
Talk to me once to see if you want to talk to me lots.

And the main thing was
He said I could work out once a week for 20 minutes.
To get fit?
Yes.
Of course every body is different.
And actual weight loss has to do with food.
But he could help with that too.
I couldn’t resist.
Plus I could walk to this gym.

It’s been a few months.
I’m feeling better.
I can see a difference.
Slowly but surely.
And my jacket does fit better.

There’s so much science to this workout.
I can barely understand it let alone explain it.
The only part of science I get
Is the super esoteric particle physics.
Which is what sucked me into that time particle thing.

---

Anyway that’s all context.
Here’s the thing
I learned in my last workout
It feels super helpful
For our purposes here.

A few of the machines seemed like
They were giving me a headache.
That sounded crazy to me though
So I didn’t mention it.
But it kept happening.
So I finally did say something.
Oh yes, Chad nodded.
Headaches.
That’s a thing.
Oh!
It’s always nice to know you’re not crazy.

His suggestion?
Take the energy that’s accumulating in your head
The ‘head ache’
And move that energy
Into the muscles you’re working out.
He explained it in more sciencey way.
But essentially
The headache is energy
Running from the experience of effort/pain.

Try staying with the feeling
In the muscles that are working.
Oh.
Wait - I thought this wasn't yoga.
Or writing.
Stay with it.
Be comfortable with being uncomfortable.
Don’t run.
Don’t toss.
Don’t try to escape.

So.
I was pulling a billion pounds down
And then resisting the release up.
And I didn’t run from the feeling.
It required intense focus.
But it worked.
No headache.
Woah.

That’s part of what I love about this workout.
The focus.
You are working to get to muscle failure.
And you have to focus to work that hard.
You have to actually put your phone away.

Plus just the idea that you are working
To get to muscle failure.
How much do I love the practice
Of having to fail to succeed.
Or more correctly -
A practice where failing is succeeding.
As a creative person
This is a genius practice.

More on that another time.
For today
The huge idea
About training energy to move
Towards the discomfort.

As creators
We can think about that as the unknown.
Every shitty first draft.
Every time you get on stage with new material.
Moving towards the rewrite and knowing you have to kill your darlings.
Getting your dream part with an intimidating director.
Learning to sing when you’ve been told you can’t.
Etc etc.
There are a million creative situations
That cause your
Your attention/focus/energy to want to run.

Your task is to notice.
And gently guide that energy back in.
Welcome it
Into the discomfort.

One suggestion.
This is a great tool
For finding your next project.
The project where the emotional energy is.
The one that has pain
You are running from.
(I’ll cover many other techniques for deciding on projects
In my Pick Your Next Project Bootcamp
May 4 on Zoom.)

---

Finally.
You are probably familiar with the equation
Pain + time = comedy.
It’s true.
Small pain. Less time.
Big pain. More time.
That’s why we have the phrase too soon.
It means not enough time has passed.
Wouldn’t it be amazing if we could just
Create those time particles instead of waiting?!

And I notice as I’m writing about pain that
Pain + C = Panic.
Let C = Claustrophobia.
Too close.
Can’t breathe.

But if you can pause
And breathe into it
Like I did with the head pain
And let the place that’s doing the work
Draw the energy back in:
The delts in my workout
Or your heart with creativity.
So much growth is possible.

And creatvity.
We think of it as making things.
But it comes from a word meaning to grow.
And the way to grow
Is to put the energy into the place where the effort is.
Where it might hurt.
Growing pains.

Oh and PS.
Doing this workout led me back to my yoga mat.
Without having to depend on yoga for all my fitness needs
I was free to love yoga
For what the practice is so brilliantly designed for.
An intimate experience of union.
Body/mind
Body/spirit
Movement/breath
Front/back
Etc/etc.

It takes courage to focus on where it hurts.
I’m cheering you one from here.

For now.
And infinitely yours,
xo Beth